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For each of these tips on how to play hard to get, I’m comparing the advice your teenybopper magazine might have given you 20 or more years ago with real-life advice I’ve seen work for women who are over 40 and single.Younger you might have ditched her friends to hang out with her guy nonstop. I’m betting that Bethany and Tiffers were pretty peeved that you were “that girl” who ditched them for a guy…only to come crawling back when you two split.Find a way to let him know that, while you want to get to know one another better before jumping into bed, you are looking forward to it happening when it does.You’re not teasing him…but you do want to let him know you want to take your time…and that it’ll be sooo worth it when it happens.Instead, use what I call the Text Initiation Ratio: for every two of his calls or texts, initiate your own.You want to make sure he’s reaching out because he wants to talk to you, not in response to you always initiating the conversation.But you’re older and wiser now, and you understand that it’s important to balance all aspects of your life, including love. If you have dance class on Mondays, go out with the girls for happy hour on Wednesdays, and do yoga on Saturday mornings (not to mention having lots of time for you to curl up on your couch and read by yourself), don’t change a thing about your schedule. Keeping your activities communicates to this guy that, while you like him, he doesn’t take priority over the other things that are important in your world. there is absolutely no rule that says you have to have the same hobbies as him!So if you think this guy is worth your time, by all means, give him some of it. These are the activities and hobbies that keep you whole and happy, so never ever give them up. Either you do your own stuff separately or you can introduce one another to things you enjoy doing. So if you absolutely hate hockey after he takes you to a game, he can share that with his brother while you go get pedicures with your BFF.
But if you wait for him to initiate at least 2/3 of the time, you quickly notice when the time between texts stretches out to days. If you have sex too soon, he might get the impression that you just want something casual (which is fine with him), while you may get emotionally attached too early, making you invest more emotionally into the relationship than he does.via GIPHY Yes, you’re a modern woman, and I fully support you making the first move with a guy, but realize that men are psychologically wired to like to chase things (women, animals). Maybe in your 20s, you were the forward girl who would kiss a guy first.