Dating after breakup for men
These men are able to observe their reactions, triggers, and behaviours without feeling the need to become defensive or aggressive.
Pondering on that, I wondered what traits they had in common. These men tend to: At the root of their discomfort is the belief that their self worth is based on how they’re perceived by others.
But feeling that pain, holding it in the body, letting the uncomfortable feelings rise and peak, is the way through.
Actively seeking support to stay in that pain while it rises is the solution. Deliberately letting your mask slip and being willing to accept the depth of your hurt begins the healing process.
Yes, we’ve broken out of all men automatically being expected to express in this way, but the perception still persists.
It’s much better to bottle up those feelings of vulnerability. When challenged on it, deny everything and go into defensive or passive-aggressive mode. The bottom line is that when we over-identify with any trauma as if it’s still happening, we go into defence mode.When we wish to ease our suffering, we must first own it and accept it, in order to release it.